Things you discover only after living for a while in USA

By now it is almost 3 months after i have arrived to the USA, though i am living in the most latinized part of it - South Florida that is over populated by descendants from Central and South America.

I will keep it really short - this port is about what you learn when you come up here:

1. What is racism
Before i have arrived here i hardly can remember any situations in my life when i could experience what racism was. On my first week a girl from my class at the university told me that i dont imagine how racist this country was. She is Canadian and she is black. At the end of our talk she added to me: "but you will be ok, you have very "white" appearance, very American, you will get good job." This is the first time in my life i ever heard anything like that. After i went deeper with studies i realized how hot in this country the topic of diversity and successfully managing diversity is. Basically in successful countries a lot of managemenet efforts are being put to leverage the diversity of employees, teach them cultural understanding and communication. There are many legal documents that regulate this topic, trying to equalize rights of diverse groups. But till the end of the days statistics clearly says that YES, racism is in US. Women get paid less, black people get paid less, get worse promotion opportunities. And even if you open your eyes and look around what u will discover is that worse, less paid, dirty job (people cleaning streets, guards etc)is normally done by black people. And this i saw in Florida, in NYC and in Washington D.C. And it is not a coincidence - this is how it is. Sometimes i felt that black people separate themselves in a way by having a different style of clothes and speaking with quite different accent (that i personally like many other people can hardly understand). Once i had dicussion with a girl from my university group and we really disagreed with each other and at one point of conversation she asked me if i act so because she was black. I was so embarassed and i answered her that she was more racist than i was, because she was the one who connected disagreement with race. From my side i never considered Ukrainians racists, but after living for 1 week with my Ukrainian friends in NYC (they live there for 5 years already) i heard them saying "oh those chinese...", "oh those balc people they are so rude", "oh pakistani dont have any respect or value to women". Well, country that is so diverse seems to have major problems with accepting differences of its people.

2. American auto makers suck
I have been reading a couple of American management books during these 3 months and they are all full of exmaples - mainly from car-making or compter-making businesses.
It's interesting that those books say that the only way American car makers revolutionized auto industry was when Ford invented conveyor. Ever since then Japanese revolutionized auto production by introducing concepts of continous quality improvement.
Japanese have implemented TQM first(though it was invented by American), they introduced lean manufacturing (philosophy of continously finding ways to improve efficiency of the production processin order to reduce costs)and quality circles of employees. Those books clearly say that Japanese cars like Honda and Toyota significantly outperform American brands by quality and reliability. Well, you can see that in the roads. Well, American auto giants themselves admitted they do bad cars when asking American people in their letter to support Congress in giving them bailout recently.

3. Fear of getting sick
I think i never feared to get sick before i got to USA. I mean of course it is always upsetting, but do you ever fear of going to the hospital or getting flue? Nope...But if you come to the USA you do start having fear. It becomes much worse after you watch Michael Moore's "Sicko" (i do recommend watching it, it is impressive indeed). There are so many people who got bankrupted because of medical bills. There are so many people that get hurt and still dont go to hospitals because they just cant afford it. And if u think medical insurance can solve it, you better watch above mentioned movie and you will see how people die because medical insurance companies refuse to cover their expenses. And once you start researching the insurance policies you basically discover that they dont or hardly protect you against hardest deseases - heart problems, AIDS, cancer - and those are your direct road not only to death but to bancrupcy. I started to drive recently and i fear accidents mainly because i dont have idea about how much it may cost me to get to the hospital. I am afraid slip on the wet floor. From today i am covered with medical insurance but my fear remains.


4. Fear of getting shot by police
During my first month in USA i was stopped by police. Basically it is different from Ukraine. In Ukraine the guy waives a stick for you to stop. Here i just heard police car behind me and a sound of serene. I didnt know it meant i needed to stop. So Marcelo told me to stop and park beside the road. so i did. i took out my license and i asked him if i should go out. He looked at me like crazy and told me that no way one can leave the car when being stopped by police - because police man has the right to shot you without notice. That was a huge suprise. I passed my driving rules test by then, i got my license, i knew all fines i can get for speeding up or not stopping for a school bus, but noone ever told me i can be shot when opening the door of my car to talk to policeman.


5. Why in Ukraine service is bad and prices are high
Ever since i have arrived to USA i was always surpised with prices and level of service. Wherever you go to eat, buy something, arrange something - you mainly get great customer service. The call centre of Bank of America greets you by saying: "How can we overexceed your expectations". If you order a food you normally get huge plate that you cant eat - and u just ask a waiter and he gives you a box to take the rests of the food home. Everyone tries to please and help you, make great impression. I remember opening bank account in Ukraine - whole mess, waste of time, very inefficient. Opening bank account here was a pleasure, very comfortable, they make it very easy and user friendly for customer. Price often surpises you too. For example i am going to a gym here every week - i pay 33 USD monthly. This includes huge amount of work out machines and cardio zone, sauna, pool, all kinds of group exercises (salsa dance, step, yoga, pilates etc). I can use it 24/7. Is it possible in Ukraine? I remember looking for a gym in Kyiv - unbelievable prices, a lot of limitations. In Ternopil i was paying around 30 USD per month for using a gym that was a size of regular 2 -room appartment. I only could come 3 times per week from 6 till 7 p.m. And obviously choice of what u could do there was quite limited.
WHY???????????
Why dress from St. Lauren in Miami costs 65 USD and in Kyiv it costs 300 USD? Why Polo shirt here costs 40 USD and in Ukraine 140 USD?
Why beer costs just 1 dollar more on the top of Marriot hotel on Times Square in New York in the fency restaurant that turns around it's axis during 1 hour so that you can have amazing 360o view on Manhattan? WHY???????????
When you start thinking about it and learn about American economy you realize that American business is obsessed with efficiency - with continiously decreasing the costs, with offering to the customers the same product but for a lower price, or better product but for the same price. Because they are in war for customers. because every niche of business here has such a fierce competition that there is no other way to survive and stay on the market. And well prices become more or less equal so what starts mattering is who gives better service. And customers obviosuly remain with those who offer excellent products, lower prices and great service. And That makes the whole big difference for American people. Even person getting comparably low salary can sustain good life - can get a car, go to the gym, buy diverse food etc.

Does this concept exist in Ukraine? Who cares about efficiency so much? Do we have competition in Ukraine? If u ever visit USA, you realize that we dont. So we will keep having those insane prices for clothes, shoes, everything as long as there will be no fierce competition. I just hope that this compeition will be created by Ukrainian producers, instead of Western companies getting into our market and just getting us out of the game because we are not able to provide the same price/quality due to historical inefficiency. Good part of it that everything that isnt working well in Ukraine is a business opportunity. And u can basically get rid of competitors by offering outstanding service and lower price. And lower can go really far in Ukraine:)

6. Fear of being sued for breaking glass

I was washing dishes in the kitchen and i broke a glass. As usually i just cleaned the rests of them and throwed them into trash bin. After a while i was told that i could be sued by the person who picks up a trash because i created danger for his health


7. It sucks not to wear seatbelt
Finally i was positively surpised that people here respect wearing seatbelts. And i remember many times in Ukraine people ignoring it and even making fun of you that you are not cool if you wear it. Stupid it is to believe that you may be uncool by preventing yourself.


That's it for today:)
i will try to be shorter next time;)

for all AIESECers - beginners and not only

RRR strange header after 3 months of not posting anything.
Briefly: i am back to Ukraine, 3 months of non-AIESEC life after 6 years in organization, in a week i am going to US for at least 1,5 years...

Back to the point.
for understanding better the situation small introduction: after 7 years being away from home (university, but mainly AIESEC) this was first time that i spent at home with my parents so much time - 3 months. During last year i was at home maybe 1 week and 5 previous years 4 days maximum per month.

These 3 months brought me back to my family and put first time in my life really close with my father who was rejecting my choices since i remember myself.
But this is not the point.
The point is that in the evening i was speaking with my sister who is currently also in AIESEC in the MC and i was asking when it would possible for her to come and visit me and my parents. As normal AIESECer, even more - as normal MC member she answered me naming huge list of upcoming events explaining why it makes it impossible for her to come. And it all sounded so familiar. I was the same!!!!!!!!!! Even worse i imagine.
But this time i happened to be on the other side of situation - among the people who havent seen my sister for a while (2-3 times during 3 months).
This time i remembered sad eyes of my parents truly beleiving that AIESEC became an obstacle for them to be with their children. AIESEC as a religion made their children first think of AIESEC and only then about parents. parents became the place to visit when there is nothing more important to do because we have FMs, conferences, taskforces, LCCs, LTSs, legislations. nevertheless that in AIESEC we are quite often guilty in lack of productivity and those hours wasted in those numerous events could have been hours of happiness in the hearts of our parents.
By no mean i want to say that we forever should get stucked in the houses of our parents and not follow our heart. But i want to tell to every AIESECer - it is not fair to make our parents 2nd priority. They are the people who made us who we are, who created conditions and opportunities for us that we were continously taking advantage of.
our parents are the people who ALWAYS forgive us and ALWAYS ready to help us.
We will never find this kind of people in our lives.
it is not fair to them.
In my case no matter how bad were the relationships between me and my dad and how strongly my father hates AIESEC, my father never ever refused to help me when i neeeded something, even when it was giving me money to go to Brazil to meet my boyfriend.
i dont know if i am being successful until now in trying to tell to every AIESECer: -- never ever forget about your parents
- make an effort to plan your visits with them and make sure you are there with them, not with your laptop
- keep telling "thank you" to your parents
- work on productivity of AIESEC work - AIESEC cant' and shouldn't consume your life. Be the master of your life
- BE with your parents as much as you can, you owe them too much

Easy to say, ha? i was the same addict. And now i know i have made a mistake chosing so many times AIESEC instead of parents. because now i could see how sad the parents are and how abandoned they feel when kids are taken away from them by something called AIESEC

Brazil

Just to sum up - i didnt get Uruguayan visa on time, i lost ticket, but Marcelo bought another ticket (oh money, i have so many thoughts about power of money nowadays)

On the Argentinean customs i heard already familiar phrase: Señorita, you have one entry visa, you cannot come back to Argentina if you go to Brazil.
There is no way for me to describe intensity emotions i had in this moment. The tears in the eyes and panic in the face were just small reflection of what was happening inside me. It was probably the strongest moment in my life when 2 strongest values in me conflicted in me so much. It was Love Vs Responsibility (right after Brazil i had to be at conference).
I was thinking "WHY?????? WHY is it happening to me? Is it the last sign that i shouldn't go to Brazil"
I had thousands of thoughts a second and thousands of doubts. With the tears in the eyes i told them that i WILL cross the boarder. I got exit stamp, my visa was canceled and all shaking i crossed the boarder.
I will probably never forget this moment, when i made this crazy decision that made me realize that no matter of anything LOVE is the most strong value in me.

I arrived to Marcelo's city, i was so happy to see him. When i was kissing him, i wa asking myself how could i possibly doubt about crossing the boarder.

I told him about the visa and his mother told me to stay to live with them:)

It was amazing how warm his family accepted me - i couldnt expect it.
I am not only talking about parents - i mean aunts, uncles, grandparents.
i was so touched.
And his friends - people were so friendly.

One day before flight friendly Brazilian people made me Argentinean multiple visa in 4 hours (normal process takes 1 week).

With no consequences i had amazing 3 days in Brazil with Marcelo and his family and friends and came back to Southern Cone to live my last moments of Southern Cone XP.

No we are thinking when it is better for him to come to Ukraine.
And Ukraine should create in him the same feeling of home as Brazil did in me...

Si Dios Quiere

Here in Latin America i heard many times people saying ¨Si Dios quiere¨. It means: "If God wishes". Basically you can ask someone: "Will you come on time to the meeting", and as the answer you may hear this phrase. In a way for me it seemed to be always a kind of the way to remove responsibility over your life from yourself to Dios.

When in August i discovered suddenly i don't have money to pay ticket to Turkey to see Marcelo, that was the phrase that i heard.

When my US visa was rejected for the 1st time, that was the phrase i heard.

When on Tuesday i found out that my visa to Uruguay is not valid and i cant take my flight to Brazil, this phrase came up to my mind. And i heard it from some of my friends from Ukraine too.

This "Si Dios quiere" creates in me a feeling of total "impotencia" - powerlessness.
If you get used to this mindset, first difficulty will stop you from making the effort, making it again and again, until it works, or works partially!!!!

I went to Turkey, i went to US and now i am going to Brazil to see Marcelo and meet his family - with or without Uruguayan visa.

Every difficulty is the challenge of our commitment to our dream.
The most horrible feeling is to know that YOU didn´t make enough, gave up fighting for the dream.
Thanks to everyone, especially to Andrea Bettosini, who helped me so much to fight with bureaucracy and cold hearted people.

"When you really want something, the whole universe conspires in helping you" - i believe in this much more than in "Si Dios quiere"

When u know you are Ukrainian

There are a lot of beautiful presentations about when you know you are Ukrainian.
One of the strongest moments when i felt i AM Ukrainian was this year when i had to pass through enormous amount of bureaucracy and disrespect applying for visa to EVERY country where i was traveling.

Yes, you feel like Ukrainian, when visa may separate you from dream, from love, from what you sincerely want with all your heart.

Some time ago this year i was reading the book of Erich Maria Remarque about 2nd World War and people, especially Jewish, running away from the territory when there was a war and concentration camps faking passports, using passports of dead people etc. He wrote in one part ¨No walls were ever built higher than the walls of bureaucracy and visas permits¨. I read it and i felt i know what he meant and that even today its true.

And the case that inspired me to write this post happened today when i found out that Uruguayan embassy made mistake issuing my visa and i now i need another one. and it takes 15-20 days to get it and they dont care they have made mistake, and they treated me awfully. What it means for me? It means that i cant go to Brazil this Friday too see Marcelo and meet his family, because my flight is Uruguay-Brazil and i don't have money for another flight.

The consul was speaking with me with sarcastic smile trying to imitate he knew some Russian, he managed to say: "Nye mogu nichem pomoch".

Idiot, i am not Russian, i am Ukrainian!!!!!

The story of stuff

Watch this, its worth 20 minutes that u will spend
http://www.storyofstuff.org/index.html

Things i love here

Argentinean ice cream - its the best one i have ever tried in my life
Argentinean barbecue with sauces
When Walter cooks
When Sebas is DJ
When David goes crazy and speaks about his strange ideas
When Maxi gets drunk
My tango classes and this video:
http://youtube.com/watch?v=r3ZWblOecYg
My Spanish teacher Graciela
The way women in Buenos Aires dress
Shoes of all colors in the world
My apartment (if just the ghost wasnt there)
Second floor of Pacha where people dance regaeton and cumbia
Observing people watching football
Pizza (too many points about the food)
Mandarinas 2,5 kg for 1 USD (again!!!!!!!)
Traveling through Andes
Santiago - i love this city
Sea lions
Hospitability of Chileans
Dance salsa, merengue and regaeton - that makes me crazy
Ocean
Once - food at 8 p.m. in Chile
Chorillana and borgona
Coffee from the street in Buenos Aires
Mornings
Mate
All my new friends that i found in these 3 countries
Coming to Chile and speaking with Argentinean accent and vice versa
Friday evenings with the guys from the team
Stories from the Princess life
Understanding jokes in Spanish

A lot of things that make my life so full of enjoyment here

International Leadership Congress in Spain

Again i completely left this page without any news for quite a long time.

So at the end of March i went to International Leadership Congress (LDS and EXPRO of IGN) which was held in Barcelona.

As usually i had a lot of problems with visa, so again i felt like Tom Hanks from Terminal (complicated to be citizen of Krakozhzhya:( )

I had a lot of expectations towards this conference - it was my last international conference in AIESEC, it was Expro, that once made a lot of difference for me in my MC term, it was first time at purely Iberoamerican conference, it was first time working with AI as faci. that was AIESEC aspect, the other very important thing was that i would finally meet again Marcelo after almost 3 months of not seeing each other.



It will be too much if i start here explaining all my emotions connected to ILC, i will just wrap up:

- That was one of the most challenging conference in my life. By no way from professional side, rather than from personal side. First time in my whole AIESEC life i didn't connect at all with faci team. I was so hungry for the faci XP in big multinational team and i felt so dropped out from the team. I didnt laugh from the jokes, i couldnt get the mood, i was not having feeling of chemistry that i used to have before...
- I was very much disappointed with the level of agenda and the way delegates experience was managed at the conference - be it newbie or MC VP current - all people had the sessions together, which was somethign unbelievable for me...
- Lastly i was shocked about how unreceptive people from conference team were to feedback. Feedback was just not passing. All good things were accepted with claps, all bad - ignored completely. I was all the time remembering the words of Piret (estonian girl that was in SSGN board one year ago) "In Latin America u dont say negative things, people dont like it".

At certain moment i started to feel very CEE - very crytical all the time, challenging everything. This is something that makes working in CEE very difficult - people challenging what u are doing all the time, but at the same time it gives a drive of excellence in what u are doing.
How can u grow, achieve, change if u dont accept and analyze your mistakes, if u refuse to learn from others?
What is all this achievement mood about?
It felt so faked to me... People from other GNs were excited about the mood of IGN people, about fun and enjoyment that seems to be appearing from nowhere. That is what amazes me too. But that's not enough.
After some days i remembered the book of Ichak Adizes about Management Vitamins.
The moral is simple that there are 4 kinds of management - he calls them vitamins of management. If organization has only one, organization will die, will never become successful in long and short term. But if organization manages to combine these 4 different vitamins, it will obtain long term health and prosperity.
The same thing is here. Every GN seems to have its vitamin that is very present and is caused by culture of the region. As long as we dont learn from vitamins of each other, we will remain at the same level we are now.
If we want to drive change and achievement in lets say IGN - IGN has to learn from others.And i think accepting feedback is a good thing to start from



I ended up the conference with the strange feeling i shared with few people. We in AIESEC speak so much about powerful learning environment, we invest so much time and money into conferences (so many delegates came from Americas paying over 1000 USD) and we fuck them up simply by not providing valuable content.
Is it acting sustainably? Is it striving for excellence? Its not.

Probably that post sounds a bit pessimistic and too crytical, but thats the way i felt.

I also had a lot of good moments and met a lot of great people, i spent amazing moments with Marcelo.

This conference had a potential to make the difference and it didnt, because we are very often not who we say we are.